As an engineer, I struggle with things that are erratic, random, unpredictable, irregular, uncertain, unreliable, wayward, volatile, anomalous, and inconsistent. In the world of Science and Engineering, inconsistencies are a barrier to achieving controlled results. If inconsistencies persist, they must be analyzed, understood, and eliminated. Consistency must exist for Engineering. That’s why we have laws, theorems, theories, and principles. These are important. They are the reason you can be on the 100th floor of a sky scraper, why you can steer a vehicle at 80mph over bridges safely, or fly in an airplane, or spend time at the international space station. Control is possible because of consistency. This consistency applies to materials, suppliers, manufacturing techniques, quality control, and following proper procedures.
As a minister, I struggle with human conditions that are inconsistent. Both in others and in myself, I swim in a river of inconsistent beliefs, behaviors, and actions. And I struggle with having enough compassion to forgive and to begin again in love. To quote the Pope, who am I to judge? When I’m more of a minister and less of an engineer, I find that I don’t need to approach the inconsistencies as something that needs to be analyzed, understood, and eliminated. There’s an acceptance of inconsistencies that serves a minister well, though it makes an engineer ineffective. Is our choice to either accept inconsistencies or to strive to eliminate them?
Like so many things in life, the choice is not an either/or decision. There’s always a middle way, albeit difficult to navigate. As an Engineering manager, I saw brilliant engineers who were social failures with their families and partners. They were phenomenal at conquering inconsistencies when they involved materials, chemical reactions, and physics, but they were challenged at understanding another person’s wants or desires. When the situation could be scientifically understood with enough study and research—these people were geniuses. When the situation was dominated by human emotions—these people were as useful as a bicycle to a pig. These were fine people doing the best they could, but living with inconsistencies was their greatest challenge. They loved their work where things could be somewhat controlled, and struggled with other environments.
I hope to get better at living with inconsistencies, because I don’t see another way forward into a meaningful life. As an engineer, the job was meaningful only by comprehending and controlling. As a minister, life is meaningful only by accepting the mystery of life and the inconsistencies. It also helps having faith that all will be better by our sustained efforts of promoting hope, compassion, and love. I am learning this—sometimes in spurts and sometimes by slipping backwards.
What if you framed inconsistencies in others as accepting that they are doing the best they can—and likely they will learn from their experiences? Could that be a healthier path than judging, arguing, and fighting to try and control the outcome of their actions? Could living with inconsistencies be central to spiritual growth? I’m not talking about passive acceptance of everything that happens. I’m wrestling with realizing that I am only in control of a very few personal issues—but I am called to make the world a more loving place.
May we all become better at living with small human inconsistencies while simultaneously working against those things that are injustices—and having the wisdom to know the difference…………….may it be so……..Rev Russ