Thoughts from Rev Russ December 2019
I was talking with some friends recently—a therapist and a pediatrician. We were talking about the expanding use of trauma diagnosis—that is, where trauma is being defined well beyond the battlefield (what we often associated with PTSD) to people who have experienced plane crashes or shootings or major surgery. In our experiences—we agreed that once the “condition” of the person’s anxiety was named—there was a reorientation of the person’s attitude and even a calmness that washes over them. We talked about how there’s a turning point in dealing with a troubling issue after it is named.
As an engineer, this makes no sense. A person’s condition is identical before and after the condition is named. How can just a label make a person feel better and even positively change their attitude?
As a minister, this change occurs so often that it doesn’t have to make sense. I’ve seen this so often that I can testify that it is fundamental to the human endeavor called “life.”
We like to know what is happening to us. We like to be in control. We strive to minimize pain (of all forms) and work to maximize pleasure. We want to be happy. We want people we love to be happy.
We deeply dislike a mystery—especially when it causes us physical or emotional pain. The drive to understand the mysteries around us started the scientific revolution and has taken humankind into an age where most all aspects of our life are far better than ever before. Yet there are still so many mysteries amongst us that we get little comfort from all the achievements of sciences—and we eagerly await the next major breakthrough to heal our troubles.
Yet our angst and troubles often torture us such that we feel lost, inadequate, guilty, swamped with remorse, angry, or depressed. Why am I feeling so sad? Why doesn’t she just take care of her child? Why do I have this pain in my stomach? Why is he so scared to go out in public? Why can’t she stop drinking so much? What is this lump? Why can’t I sleep at night? Why……….why……….why……. why……….
We deeply dislike a mystery, but if we are given a name for it—we begin again. Naming doesn’t fix our troubles, but it does create a setting of beginning again knowing something about why we feel the pain. Sometimes it feels like having a name for it gives us control again.
Humans are fragile, and life sometimes makes no sense and occasionally seems punitive without justification. When life makes no sense–this is when the role of a religion and a church/fellowship manifests—to gather together to try and name what happened.
We like to know what is happening to us. We like to be in control. We like to be happy. When that state eludes us, a religious community can help us name it—even if the name is
“I don’t know, but I’m here to walk together with you.”
Yours in shared ministry…………………..Rev Russ